Um, Can You Use a Vibrator While Pregnant?
They are trained to offer support, guidance, and advocacy throughout a clients pregnancy, delivery, andpostpartum.
And theyve likely attended as many (or more) births than your average OB/GYN or midwife.
And the way they treat you’re free to make or break your experience.
Same goes for your provider.
You should take your time finding the right fit.
certified birth doula and childbirth educator
The best way to do this is by interviewing each one.
Another thing to look for is how well they will support your choices.
While they offer guidance, they should never make a run at push you into anything.
Nonjudgmental care is so important, says Sainte-Rose.
Sample questions to ask providers:
2.
Scenarios like this are common.
In these moments, its important to use your powerful tool of informed consent.
Informed consent means having all the information and then from there, choosing a decision, says Sainte-Rose.
This can be very traumatizing for people, particularly those with a history of sexual abuse, she says.
certified birth doula and childbirth educator
For example, your provider should ask whether its okay to do a cervical check.
This shows respect for your bodily autonomy and puts you in charge of the situation.
But if at any point throughout the process something doesnt feel rightphysically or emotionallyyou can always say no.
Remember, you are the boss of your birth, says Sainte-Rose.
Everybody in that space works for you.
No one feels that way, but its so true.
If they seem dismissive or resistant, odds are theyll be the same way when you give birth.
Listen to it, trust your intuition, and say no if something feels off.
Trust your intuition if something feels off.
Celina Sainte-Rose, doula
4.
Choose the place you give birth carefully
Whereyou give birth can be just as important aswhoassists your birth.
Choosing the right place to give birth is very important, says Sainte-Rose.
Each facility has a different birth culture.
And then, of course, theres the homiest place of allyour actual home.
No option is any better than the other.
Its all about whatyouwant for your birth.
If you hire a doula, you could talk to them about your wants and needs.
).Leapfrog Ratingsis a great online resource where you could find this kind of info.
Ultimately, this research is well worth it.
Seek out childbirth classes
Yes, childbirth is amazing and mysterious, but it can also be downright intimidating.
One of the best ways to do this is by taking an out-of-hospital childbirth class, says Sainte-Rose.
Itll remind you that informed consent and the right to refuse certain procedures are tools at your disposal.
Youll learn to use them whenever you needwhich, TBH, may be more often than you think.
And sadly, certain groups, includingbirthing persons of color, are more likely to be dismissed or mistreated.
Thats why support from your partner and people on your birth team (like a doula) is essential.
On top of asking about your needs, they should also do their own birth prep, she says.
Sainte-Rose loves to help partners figure out how to support and advocate for their birthing person.
The doula is a doula for the entire family, she says.
She encourages partners to reach out to their doulas with their concerns and questions.
Trust us: Steps taken by partners to prep before birth will pay dividends on the big day.
If thats all you know about birth, you might think this is how it has to go.
But pushing on your back isnotthe only option.
Truth is, you have many choices.
The same is true even if youve had an epidural.
In case you didnt know, an epidural is a pain medication given during labor.
Many people think they cant move once they get one.
But thats not the case at all.
Theres not a perfect position to push; its whatevers right for you, says Sainte-Rose.
In other words, if it feels good to lie down and push, you do you.
Whats most important is to listen to, respect, and trust what your bodys saying, she says.
That said, your provider must also be onboard, as well, adds Sainte-Rose.
This goes back to advocacy and having those conversations in prenatal appointments, she says.
Birth plans are an important part of prepping for birth, says Sainte-Rose.
They empower you to learn about all your options and choose which ones might work best for you.
But theyre only one piece of a much larger puzzle, she says.
Unfortunately, a sheet of paper cant guarantee youll get the birth you want.
Almost always, something happens in birth thats unexpected.
In these situations, youll likely have to pivot from your original plan.
A birth plan also doesnt ensure your provider will treat you the way you want.
Meaning, it doesnt substitute for your self-advocacy work, says Sainte-Rose.
And your physical surroundings play a huge part in this.
No matter where you choose to birth your baby, you’re free to create the right vibe.
Again, its like planning for your wedding.
People plan cake toppers and bows on seats, says Sainte-Rose.
They have a specific vision in mind about how they want the ambience to feel.
you might do the same detailed planning for your birthing space.
First ask yourself how you want the space to look and feel.
Then use this image to bring that space to life.
Yep, were talking about C-sections, or cesarean birth.
Though a C-section may not be your first option, it doesnt have to be a terrible birthing experience.
You even have some control over how things go in the operating room, she says.
What do you need from me?
How can we help you to process this?
Maybe you feel rushed, unheard, or dismissed.
For example, a lot of providers will take late transfers, says Sainte-Rose.
You might have to call around, but you will likely find other options.
This way, there wont be any major surprises or disappointments from your care team on the big day.
In these cases, your support from your partner and doula can become even more vital, she says.
Both of these things are exactly a doulas job.
Working with a doula is the best investment that youll make in your birth, says Sainte-Rose.
In an ideal world, every birthing person would have access to doula services.
But in reality, they can be too costly for many.
Doula services can run anywhere from a few hundred to several thousand dollars.
Most of us are in this work because we love it, and we want to help.
To find a qualified doula in your area, check outDONA Internationals search tool.
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