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Let me start out by saying this: I am not a yogi.
I mean, I guess in a very literal sense, I practice yoga therefore I am a yogi.
So, if youre like me, I totally get it.
yoga teacher and instant healing, emotional integration, and ancestral trauma extraction coach
Despite my fears, I did step into a yoga studio one day.
About five years ago, I took a class for the first time.
My hamstrings were tight, my hips were weak, and my back hurt.
I had ahalf marathonon the schedule, so I decided to give it a shot to save my race.
Im glad I did, but not because I miraculously gained flexibility and continued on my running journey.
We all have seen studies and headlines that preach the numerousbenefits of yoga.
For me, it went beyond that.
Shes practiced yoga for nearly two decades and has been teaching for almost 10 years.
Weve kept in touch even though I now live in Utah and shes in Lisbon, Portugal.
yoga teacher and instant healing, emotional integration, and ancestral trauma extraction coach
I think yoga is just so beneficial, not just physically, but mentally, she says.
It can be very somatic.
As we talked, it was clear that every person will have their own individual yoga journey.
These are the lessons I learned and how yoga changed my life.
In my head, Id nailed it.
Then, he arrived at my mat to slightly adjust whatever the heck my body was doing.
In my other fitness ventures, I was always trying to force myself to the next level.
How many more reps can I get at a certain weight?
How many more miles can I maintain at this speed?
But in yoga, this was a no-no.
I learned that consistency would allow my body to open up and go deeper into the poses.
I would also learn that every day would be different.
Sometimes you dont have the space to put your hand on the floor and sometimes you need a block.
But perhaps more importantly, this concept helped me evolve holistically.
About a year after starting yoga, my life felt overwhelming.
My job was chaos, requiring me to work 12 hours per day.
I was in a state of constant stress and hellbent on achieving the next position or accolade.
In a moment of despair, I realized there was no space in my life.
I left that position, and my next role allowed me to grow in other ways outside of work.
Accept imperfection
Jones was always really great about giving her class permission to be free of judgment.
She would remind us to not compare ourselves to others.
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When I accepted that, it was pretty easy let go of that quest for perfection.
To me, this was an invaluable lesson.
Jones likes to say its important to honor that perfection is in the moment.
Thats the beauty of yogaand life.
This demand for stillness in yoga was somewhat of a turnoff for me.
At first, just being stuck in one place for what felt like 700 breaths was just the worst.
For many go-go gadget-jot down people, the answer will be complex.
Maybe its a medical condition, a trauma response, or a to-do list thats too full.
Even the lack of stillness and disgruntled feeling in stillness is okay, Jones says.
Throughout the years, Ive just found a different definition for stillness, she says.
There is no such thing as absolute stillness anyway.
Your heart is beating, your lungs are breathing, theyre expanding and theyre contracting.
Instead, she recommends asking yourself What is stillness for me?
It might not be the 700 breaths in one pose for you.
It was not for mein fact, stillness for me was that opportunity for introspection.
When I practice yoga now, I dont make a run at force my mind or body into stillness.
I let it do what it wants.
If my mind wants to run through its checklist while Im in a pose, I let it.
To me, thats stillness.
In retrospect, this mightve been what I was most afraid of before I walked through the studio doors.
The best example I have is when Jones invited everyone into crow pose.
When I looked at her giving the example to the class I guffawed.
But I remember her inviting the class (of mostly beginners) toplay.
I think play gives you just permission to explore the body and find out your capacity, Jones says.
I still remember the panic of this first play time.
What I realize now is that was my true fear: attempting something and failing.
What would people think?
What would I think?
I tried it, though.
And I wanted to give it another spin.
It was reminiscent of being a kidof learning and wanting to master something new.
Lets put our energy where its actually going to be of more value.
I might ask myself: Am I forcing this or is this an opportunity to grow?
Am I comparing myself to others or is this just for me?
Am I scared of failure or can I play around and learn as I go?
Yoga classes now are casual and comfortable for me.
I dont force my body into positions that dont feel right.
I can find stillness when I want to and move when I feel like it.
I try not to compare myself to others and forgive myself when I inevitably do.
And I playI play a lot.
I can arm balance, shoulder balance, and make a lot of great bird shapes.
I may never be brave enough to get on my head unassisted.
Still, Ill keep trying.
And thats the beauty of yogaand life.
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