Struggling to move on?
A first love is, indeed, bound to have some lasting psychological implications.
For Jay, that means her ex-husbands new girlfriend is at the center of theWickedmovie publication cycle.
Days with my son are sunny, Jay writes.
Its not uncommon to wonder why you cant get over your ex whenever you hearthatsong.
Why is it so hard to forget my ex?
clinical psychologist, life fulfillment expert, and author ofDate Smart,Joy From Fear, andAging Joyfully
But in reality, theres often no conclusion to reach after asudden breakup, says Dr. Manly.
There are typically too many loose ends to tie things up neatly in a bow.
And thats particularly true if your ex didnt seek to make amends, says Dr. Hauser.
This can create real social consequences, if not implications, for both people, says Dr. Carbino.
Perhaps you lose friends, or theres a noticeable change in your social reality or status.
(Heck, it probably felt great to share those experiences with them at the time.)
That just gives them more space in your headvaluable real estate you better live your life without them.
As we sleep, our minds return to the storybooks of our past, says Dr. Manly.
Memories of our former relationships are less within our control than we might want to believe.
clinical psychologist, life fulfillment expert, and author ofDate Smart,Joy From Fear, andAging Joyfully
And that can blow the impact of an ex-partner totally out of proportion.
It may just be a natural aspect of processing past experiences, she says.
Why cant I just move on?
Youre an overthinker
If you tend to hold onto things, an ex is likely to be no exception.
Any of the above unanswerable questions can let an ex live in your head rent-free.
One common way this happens is in folks with abandonment trauma, says Dr. Carbino.
If youre anxiously attached, losing a partner is likely an enormous fear and trigger, says Dr. Hauser.
What can you do if you cant get over your ex?
), which can in turn help you move forward with more agency.
On Dr. Hausers personal list ofthings to do after a breakup?
Longer is probably better, but I know it can be hard for many to commit to this.
Getting your ex out of your mind means getting them out of your life (at least temporarily).
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