They talk about themselves constantly.
If the discussion switches to someone else, they switch it back.
They dont ask other people any questions or seem to care.
Theyre prone to one-up others.
If this sounds familiar, youve probably run head-first into whats known as conversational narcissism.
Conversational narcissism is on the narcissismspectrum.
clinical psychologist and acting director of the Argent Assessment Program at Silver Hill Hospital
Conversational narcissism and NPD have other key differences, too.
What are examples of conversational narcissism?
Simply put, a conversational narcissist tends to be self-focused when talking to others.
Conversational narcissists talk about themselves alot, Dr. Tierney says.
If they enter therapy, entire sessions can go by without the therapist contributing much to the discussion.
Conversational narcissism can show up in many ways.
(Yep, that includes anarcissistic parent!)
While this kind of behavior may seem obvious to you, it probably wont seem obvious to them.
What is narcissistic monologuing?
clinical psychologist and acting director of the Argent Assessment Program at Silver Hill Hospital
Like other narcissistic behaviors, this monologuing is driven by a desire to have all the attention.
you’ve got the option to identify narcissistic monologuing by assessing how you feel on the receiving end.
Why does someone become a conversational narcissist?
As with many ways of being, childhood experiences can be a contributing factor.
Conversational narcissists are feasters.
(Side note: Ninetypes of narcissistsexist!)
Having some compassion and understanding for these folks can be noble.
A bad experience doesnt excuse a behavior but can explain it.
In fact, having a littlemain character energyis usually innocuous.
How does conversational narcissism affect a relationship?
Conversational narcissism can breed codependent relationships, Dr. Tierney says.
Feasters and fasters regularly pair up in relationships, Dr. Tierney says.
She notes that those kinds of feelings may extend to the persons social interactions and other relationships, too.
Others may not want to be around you and your partner.
This could start to feel isolating.
At worst, they will be shocked and end the conversationnot a bad outcome, in a sense.
By not giving them that, theyll likely lose interest and move on to someone else.
It can be especially helpful in cases ofnarcissistic abuse.
Plan ahead
Only have a few minutes to talk?
Or dont have the energy to listen to them drone on and on?
Danley suggests letting the person know ahead of time that you only have a few free minutes to chat.
Let them know that you will be happy to keep talking if they keep it respectful, Danley says.
And if they are unable to, end the conversation.
You are allowed to step away.
That doesnt make you a bad person.
Regardless of the situation, remember topractice self-care.
Dealing with a conversational narcissist can be exhausting and difficult, in which you may feel powerless.
What you do have control over, though, is how you treat yourself.
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