If your world is shattered after discovering your partner stepped out, we got your back.
This is how to get over being cheated on.
(Among the many other emotions that can arise when a once-solid relationships foundation is tested.)
According to author, public speaker, and sex and relationship expertDr.
Usually, the very first thing people experience is anger, says Dr. Tara.
Then you have confusion.
licensed marriage and family therapist
Like, why did they do it?
And then hits sadness.
Then, some people experience denial, or they justify their partners actions.
And then, some people hit resentment.
That is usually the last lingering stage of the aftermath of infidelity: heavy resentment.
Our bodies react strongly when we hear news of infidelity, too, explains Dr. Tara.
Not everything is psychologicalsome things are physiological, she says.
Your whole body is in shock, says Dr. Tara.
These symptoms, coupled with sadness, can leave you feeling depressed.
licensed marriage and family therapist
Ahead are seven steps that will help you in coping with the betrayal of being cheated on.
How to get over being cheated on: 7 steps for healing
1.
Take the time that you should probably move through the shock and initial gathering of information.
Time does not heal all woundshowever, it will give you some perspective.
Take the time that it’s crucial that you move through the shock and initial gathering of information.
Time does not heal all woundshowever, it will give you some perspective.
If you have the funds, consider reaching out to a mental-health professional.
In some caseslike when your partnergaslights youor continuously displaysuntrustworthy signsit absolutely does.
In these cases, Perel believes a relationship can be salvaged with patience, communication, and understanding.
Again, a therapist can help you navigate this process for yourself.
Was it truly a lapse of judgment?
Or has this been going on for months because they crave other peoples attention?
They need to come clean and be vulnerable and share what truly happened.
Learning this information can help you decide whether you should stay or leave after cheating.
More often than not, its a journey thats best navigated with a professional.
[This] does not excuse infidelity.
This is absolutely normal.
This is especially true if you downplayed these parts of yourself while in the relationship.
Break out the watercolors and reclaim your Saturdays.
You may even want to give yourself a concrete timeline to keep yourself accountable.
Once youve made that decision, embracefresh-start energyand stick to it.
Moving forward on your own meanssetting firm boundaries with your ex and keeping an eye toward the future.
But in either case, forward motion is essential, even if youre feeling extra stuck right now.
FAQs
Do cheaters stop cheating?
This line of thinking is convenient, but not necessarily true.
Not every cheater is a habitualserial cheater.
How do I rebuild my self-esteem after being cheated on?
What percentage of relationships work after cheating?
Theres no definitive poll or study documenting howallrelationships fareafter infidelity.
For one, each person defines cheating in a different way.
Non-monogamous and LGBTQIA+ relationships are typically excluded from surveys and polls surrounding marriages, too.
Of course, we have no real way of knowing which percentage of these couples are inhealthyrelationships post-infidelity.
In the end, each instance of infidelity is as unique as the couples who experience them.
Will I ever trust again after being cheated on?
you could take this horrible experience and make something great out of it through self-care and reflection.
Extend grace and self-love to yourself and know that you are worthy of a partner that is faithful.
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