According to therapists, it’s possible to overcome trust issues in a relationship.
Read more about the signs and causes of trust issues here.
Mental health experts share more about getting over trust issues in a new relationship or friendship ahead.
What is the true meaning of trust, and why is it important?
But what does it mean to trust someone?
Its no secret that trust between two people doesnt just happen overnight.
licensed marriage and family therapist
And it manifests through both people in the relationship or friendship feeling supported and valued, adds Singer.
When we feel secure, we are more comfortable expressing ourselves authentically.
Trust allows us to get close to others and let them get close, too.
When we feel secure, we are more comfortable expressing ourselves authentically.
Trust allows us to get close to others and let them get close, too.
What are signs of trust issues?
(In some cases, trust issues might even develop intopistanthrophobia, or a fear of trusting people.)
Here are some signals of trust issues you should flag.
Intimacy makes you uncomfortable.
licensed marriage and family therapist
Trust can play a huge role in physical and emotional intimacy.
You have a hard time opening up to people.
Having difficulty with vulnerability can be another sign of trust issues, according to Harouni Lurie.
However, a lack of vulnerability can stall a relationships growth.
Commitment can be triggering to you.
Your relationships may end up staying at surface level as a result, says Harouni Lurie.
For people with ananxious attachment style, it may be the opposite.
Youre either overly self-reliant or overly dependent on a partner.
(Again, this is characteristic of avoidant attachment style.)
Your trust issues may cause you to swing more toward codependency in your relationships, adds Harouni Lurie.
Youre engaging in jealous or possessive behavior.
You should familiarize yourself with red flags of possessiveness and jealousy, according to Singer.
For example, are you getting jealous if you make other plans with a friend?
Youre always looking for things wrong with a possible partner or friend.
Trust issues may not look like overt possessiveness.
It may not even be a conscious effort to push people away.
How do trust issues develop?
And past relationships and experiences almost always affect future relationships.
Thats why its difficult to get over trust issues overnight, no matter how quickly the trust issues began.
Its a process to understand where your trust issues might arise from, and how to work through them.
Do trust issues come from anxiety?
This can lead to constantanxiety about a friendor romantic partner breaking their trust or leaving them, she adds.
Singer recommends interrogating where the anxiety and trust issues come from.
Is it really about the specific friend or romantic partner, or is it almost a self-fulfilling prophecy?
So, in general, its best to get to know someone true character before giving them your trust.
Discussing and respecting boundaries is pivotal for creating a sense of safety and security for everyone involved.
Thats not abnormal, but may mean that you need more help working through your anxieties around trust.
Working with a therapist or other mental health professional can be beneficial here.
Can a relationship last with trust issues?
Trust in a relationship is about balance.
Too much trust doesnt necessarily work in a relationship.
Theyre pushing too hard to have immediate trust and openness.
But this can drive distance between people and can lead to the dissolution of a relationship.
Emphasize that the persons feelings are valid.
Continue to approach them with curiosity and reassure them of your intentions, Harouni Lurie says.
Establish open lines of communication, especially around boundaries.
Open and honest communication is foundational to breaking down the barriers of trust issues in a relationship.
It may also be helpful for the person with trust issues to express their boundaries openly.
This approach demonstrates respect for their needs and fosters a sense of safety and trust, adds Harouni Lurie.
Use I statements to let the person know how their distrust affects you.
This can be especially applicable when a persons trust issues are causing them to exhibit detrimental or controlling behaviors.
you might support someone with trust issues by proving youre trustworthy via your actions.
Some people feel most secure when someones actions match their words, she adds.
Trust can often build over time if the person can see that you follow through.
How can I get rid of trust issues?
If youre someone working through trust issues, overcoming these feelings will require a lot of work.
Be honest with yourself and ask why this behavior is going on.
You have to first acknowledge that youre having difficulty trusting others before you could do anything about it.
Approach yourself with curiosity and compassion, and consider why you have difficulty trusting others.
Learn to trust your gut about who is trustworthy and who isnt.
3. venture to catch yourself when you are being overly distrustful.
Lets say youve beencheated onin the past by a partner who got back together with an ex.
Do you need therapy for trust issues?
Trust issues are not insurmountable.
There isnt an intentional desire to push others away, often, assures Harouni Lurie.
Yilmaz, Ceren D., et al.
Psychol., 01 November 2023.
Volume 14 2023 |https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1260480.
Arikewuyo, Abdulgaffar O., et al.
1, 13 Jan. 2020, p. 003329411989990, https://doi.org/10.1177/0033294119899902.
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