Trauma-informed sex educators who are also sexual-assault survivors share advice for how to reclaim your sexuality after assault.
Its not that youre broken, but you have to navigate yourself in a new way.
Jimanekia Eborn, trauma-informed sex educator
That reality can make it easy to feel like youre broken.
But the switchboard isnt dead; its more accurate to say it needs some reconfiguring.
Its not that youre broken, but you have to navigate yourself in a new way.
What that path looks like will be different for every survivor, says somatic coach and restorative-justice advocateMarlee Liss.
sex educator, trauma specialist, consultant, and healer
Its the bodys way of compensating for a loss of that control in the past.
Its also possible for sexuality to ebb and flow post-trauma.
But in a healing journey, theres room for all of it.
5 strategies that can help you learn how to reclaim your sexuality after assault
1.
What is The Missionary Sex Position?
Remember that shame is a feeling put upon you by other people, other things, or other circumstances.
Eborn and Liss both call these pockets of time self dates.
But that kind of pressure can lead us to cross our boundaries and just put ourselves in re-traumatizing places.
Ask yourself, What would bring me pleasure right now?
sex educator, trauma specialist, consultant, and healer
or, What would allow me to connect with 1 percent more pleasure right now?'
And at the same time, consider how you mightadd glimmersaka the opposite of triggersinto your physical space.
Perhaps these safety cues include a particularly calming sound or smell, or a comforting blanket.
TheMedusa tattoos meaning, for example, is all about survival, strength, and overcoming assault.)
One way to do this is by creating a Yes/No/Maybe list, says Eborn.
That, in and of itself, can be an experience of pleasure.
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