(Im not a graceful person, she muses.)
So, in a pandemic-imposed exile, she had the space to imagine a new name.
Theo didnt have to clock in at work and discuss a possible name change with her employer.
Shewasnt seeing her family, so she didnt have to tell them in person.
There was freedom in having mental and physical space to figure this out for herself.
She chose a new name.
Dr. Toomey is a family and developmental scientist who examines the intersections of identity, oppression, public policy, and health and well-being among sexual and gender minority populations.
When Theo received it, it was the first time she had seen her chosen name in writing.
To tell them, Theo, a graphic designer and illustrator, created a mock newspaper announcement.
Theos mother wasnt receptive,but her dad sent her an email to tell Theo that he supported her.
They live in a small town in a conservative and wondered, How are people going to respond?
how quietly do I need to do this?
She decided to tell her other friends in town who have marginalized identities.
It meant a lot to me to communicate that with somebody else, she says.
Her next step was to put she/theypronouns on her resume, which was an affirming moment.
When Amy came out to her partner, who they call cishetthrough and through, he was receptive.
Dr. Toomey is a family and developmental scientist who examines the intersections of identity, oppression, public policy, and health and well-being among sexual and gender minority populations.
He gave me a lot of grace, she says.
he didnt make it about himself.
He didnt go where does this leave us?
He let me have that.
And, whenPride Monthrolled around, Amys partner bought her a Pride flag.
Their partner gave her the flag and wished her a happy Pride.
I didnt even know I needed that [visibility], Amy says.
That was very sweet and affirming.
I look forward to all that unfolding.
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