Double-tapping the pics of the married friend you suspect is into you.
Omitting your partner from your stories about the past weekend over drinks with coworkers.
Theres a word for these are-they, are-they-not cheating behaviors: micro-cheating.
Specifically, an interest that would break the agreements you have with the partner in question.
Kahn adds that micro-cheating can be damaging to your relationship if not reeled in.
How does micro-cheating differ from regular cheating?
a therapist and advisor with Private Sugar Club
On the flipside, micro-cheating is usually a much more subtle breach of boundary, says Cook.
What are the traits of micro-cheating?
Micro-cheating typically entails spending time in the gray area of what is considered allowed or acceptable in your relationship.
Other examples of micro-cheating, per Kahn, could include any of the following.
What are signs of micro-cheating?
Guilt is ever-present
It is possible for someone to unintentionally micro-cheat.
(Hot take: Its Simone Biles).
Meanwhile, if your partner is exhibitingsymptoms of guilt, it could be because they micro-cheated, she says.
Is micro-cheating considered cheating?
a therapist and advisor with Private Sugar Club
Yes, micro-cheating is considered cheating.
(Its in the name.)
What is emotional cheating?
Theres a lot of overlap between emotional cheating and micro-cheating.
Neither form of cheating are your run-of-the-mill affairs, replete with explicit physical and/or sexual content, says Cook.
She says that secrecy is a primary ingredient of emotional cheatingwhich is also a main sign of micro-cheating.
Plus, both can still be damaging to the relationship as a whole, says Kahn.
Meanwhile, micro-cheating might be a one-off incident.
Is micro-cheating a deal breaker?
Micro-cheating can certainly impact your relationship, says Kahn.
It doesnt always signify a deal breaker or major issue within the relationship, she says.
Think of it as death by a thousand paper cuts.
How do I know if I micro-cheated?
But if you havent, it may not be so clear cut.
Still, a little self-reflection will reveal your micro-cheating behaviors to yourself, says May.
Then, May suggests putting a proactive plan in place to get to ensure that micro-cheating doesnt happen again.
And its A-OK if you need expert help doing so.
How do I address micro-cheating with a partner?
Is there a night you predict youll have the energy to do so?.
This approach can help encourage empathy from your partner, they explain.
Put on your listening ears
Equally important as initiating these discussions is listening to what your partner says.
You canpractice active listeningby paraphrasing what they say to ensure you understand their viewpoint correctly.
You could say, for example: What I hear you saying is XYZ.
Is there anything I missed or dont fully understand?
Undoubtedly, theres a thin line between continuing to talk about micro-cheating and dwelling.
If you have the emotional natural and communication skills that allow you to do so, kudos to you!
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