Can the doom-and-gloom of a pessimist mesh with the glass-half-full mindset of an optimist?
A relationship coach weighs in on the coupling.
Meanwhile Aprilwho is played byWhite LotusAubrey Plazawas a sarcastic, brooding cynic who loved to play devils advocate.
April, ever thepessimist, helped keep Andy grounded in reality.
How well does this relationship dynamic play out IRL, though?
Can optimists and pessimists get along romantically off-script?
Lyndsey Murray, LPC, is a licensed couples counselor, sex therapist, and relationship coach at Relationship Matters Therapy.
They can bring out the best in each other in a unique way, says Murray.
Sometimes optimists can be overly optimistic, and maybe arent noticing the pitfalls of their plan.
This is where a pessimist can bring them back down to reality a bit.
Trouble, Murray says, can arise when one partner persistently challenges the others concerns or sources of happiness.
The message is that you shouldnt feel bad, that it’s crucial that you get over it.
If thats always the dynamic, the person whos more pessimistic is eventually going to stop coming to you.
Pessimists need to steer clear of defeatism
Frankly, nobody likes a party pooper.
Pessimists tend to dwell on the negative what ifs of a future event.
That can feel very dismissive.
Lyndsey Murray, LPC, is a licensed couples counselor, sex therapist, and relationship coach at Relationship Matters Therapy.
Murray says you might still reach a place of mutual respect and understanding.
Ask them what makes them excited.
Ask them about what has them feeling negatively.
You dont necessarily have to agree, and thats fine.
But if youre curious, it tells your partner that youre at leastinterestedin what they have to say.
And that interest is a key to a long lasting relationship for anyone.
Build emotional trust
Establishing mutual understanding of each others worldview can strengthen the trust between an optimist and pessimist.
This trust, says Murray, can help and optimist and a pessimist feel unitedeven when they butt heads.
It feels like this person is on my side, says Murray, and theyve got my back.
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