The lows of navigating chronic illness and disabilities can feed depression symptoms.
And awareness of this is crucial.
Your Low-Stress Guide to Leveling-Up Your Bedtime Routine
Are You Burnt Out or Depressed?
They render my life an endless cycle of symptom management.
The compounding weight of living with these intersectional layers of marginalized identity can be challenging.
And I want to usher that compassion for disabilities and depression into the rest of the year.
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And yet, every round of it was painful.
Although there is topical sedation, I still feel the release of the injection into my muscle or tendon.
Every time, it hurts.
And ironically, the pain increases in the days following the injections.
Since I started the treatment, I dont know if Ive improved.
Its exhausting, but its my reality, and resenting it doesnt serve me.
Living with disability, chronic pain, and depression is a journey of acceptance.
Whats less in my control is what I call the bestie behavior between disabilities and depression.
And depression makes me feel my pain more.
In my experience, the lows of navigating chronic illness and disability feed depressions hopelessness and loneliness.
There are times when I feel like Im taking care of everything except for my sense of humanity.
Like Im managing my body as if it were a company.
Ive been speaking around the world for years, and Ive never had ramp access to the the stage.
Chronicon showed me what it would be like to be fully valued as a person.
Ive been living with major depressive disorder for seven years and disability for almost six years.
I wanted to end my life at least three times.
The worst thing for me about major depressive disorder isnt suicidal ideation, but the place before that.
Where you know that that feeling would be the next thing.
This commonly happens when a test shows nothing to validate my pain or a procedure doesnt work.
I always get support, but feeling the emotions is awful.
Its like this loop that plays in my head, tormenting me, bullying my will to live.
Im sharing this because I know how to cope now.
For weeks, I wouldnt talk to anyone about it.
Maybe eat, then go to sleep.
But, I am slowly finding ways to connect to being a human being not a human doing.
Today, I can write about it.
I tell my therapist when it is all too much.
I now view my disability, chronic illness, and major depressive disorder as gifts.
They tell me when I need to slow down, ask for help, rest, and resist.
To you, I might be inspirational or resilient, but to me, Im unstoppable.
Today I lived another day.
If you or someone you know needs support managing mental health, hey visitMental Health Americafor tools and support.
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