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And, the stomach isnt just called the second brain by scientists because of anecdotal evidence.
But where does a gut instinct end and a snap judgment begin?
We may feel uncomfortable on edge, or that something is off.
This often happens naturally, and subconsciously.
Youre doing it with your coworker, when they force a meeting that could have been an email.
licensed clinical psychologist based in Chicago
We live in a complex world where we have to make hundreds of judgment calls per day.
They are necessary, and not inherently a bad thing.
That latter point is a big one, Dr. Rabon says.
When we overly judge others, when were overly critical, we actually harm ourselves, she says.
She has seen this lead to increased stress, anxiety, and depression.
What to do when your judgments hurt more than help
1.
Pay attention to what triggers your judgmental behavior.
The first step to being less judgmental is toincrease your self-awarenessabout your judgments, says Dr. Rabon.
Lets say youre going to a party, and you judge the way someone was dressed, she says.
licensed clinical psychologist based in Chicago
Ask yourself why that set you off.
Were you feeling self-conscious about how youre dressed?
Were you judging yourself about how your body looks?
She also suggests people catch themselves in the act of overtly self-critical thoughts.
One of the ways to practice that is through self-compassion, she says.
When people are more compassionate to themselves, they can be more compassionate to other people.
Tweak your vocabulary
Do you often use words likegood,bad,always, ornever?
This is a common contributor to over-excessive judgment, she says.
Catch yourself using this language and consider whether there are exceptions to that narrative.
A solution she recommends is to also add the wordandto black-and-white thoughts.
Be curious versus critical
Its a subtle mental shift, but curiosity offers a more positive framework than criticism.
We cannot control the behaviors of others, only how we respond to them, she says.
Ask yourself, is this judgment accurate or helpful?
The more you are able to accept, the clearer the answer to that will be.
When making decisions, have a go at engage with your gut and your judgments in tandem.
How our gut sounds is usually quiet and calm, she says.
We can hear if its loud and anxious or if its calm and quiet.
Let that inform you.
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